Sex: Lubrication Guide

I’m starting off this week’s sex article with a simple statement: sexual lubricants have more uses than just combating vaginal dryness. While yes, lubricants can help with this problem, that is not the only reason they exist. With this stigma against lubricants, they are often called the most unsung sex toy.

After I first experimented with sexual lubricants I started asking my friends about their experiences. I would ask, “Have you ever used a lube?” To which I would get a very consistent response, “We don’t have a problem there.”

Here are a few reasons you might want to consider a lubricant:

• enhanced sexual experience
• enhanced protected sex
• enhanced masturbation
• required for sex toys
• varied sexual experience
• reduced condom stress
• reduced STD and pregnancy risk
• reduced pain from vaginal dryness
• reduced pain from anal sex and different sized partners

This list alone makes me want to run to the store to stock up my bedside fun box. Before we get to that though, we need to take a look at the different types of lubricants. There are three basic types: water, silicone, and oil based. Oil based lubes are generally a bad idea. They are only included here as a warning.

Water Based Lubricants

Water based lubricants are often preferred for their cleanliness and less obtrusive feel. Often they are much lighter than their silicone counterparts. Generally with a water based lubricant, you can apply it, use it, and towel off after. Any lubricant that has found its way to the sheets usually evaporates shortly after.

Even with the lighter nature of water based lubricants, they are still available in a variety of viscosities. Common grocer brands like touch and KY jelly are of the lightest variety, but most sex toy shops will have a wider selection.

Silicone Based Lubricants

Silicone lubricants are a relatively new addition. Because silicone contains no water, it does not dry up or evaporate. This makes for a longer lasting, thicker lubricant. Silicone lubricants are also available with no additives, which make for a much safer option for sensitive users. Given that they are not water soluble, you can also apply and use silicone lubricants in the water.

Silicone lubricants should not be used with silicone sex toys. They are incompatible. They will cause the material to disintegrate, leaving the surface sticky and unsuitable for use. Given the nature of silicone, it is very difficult to wash off and may permanently stain sheets.

Oil Based Lubricants

I avoid all oil based lubricants. These lubricants will break down the material of latex condoms. They leave a coat along the inside of vagina or rectum, promoting infection. They also are very hard to wash off. If a thicker lubricant is desired, silicone is a much safer choice.

Warming and Flavored Water Based Lubricants

While warming and flavored lubricants do not effect the function of the lubricant, they do add another dimension. A warming lubricant upon contact with moisture or air will gently warm the skin. You can test this by placing a small amount on your hand and gently blowing over it.

Flavored lubricants add a delicious element. In the sports world, they say that drinking flavored athletic drinks not only increases intake of vital nutrients, it also encourages the athlete to drink more water. Draw your own conclusions here.

Choosing a Lubricant

Different acts require different lubricants. While a lightweight water based warming liquid would be good for occasional partner play, a thicker, perhaps silicone, product is more suited to anal sex. Male masturbators may also want to consider a silicon based product for the same reason.

Buying a Lubricant

The key to lubrication is experimentation. Most lubricants come in small sample sizes, ranging from one to about a dozen applications. I recommend getting a variety for you and your partner to experiment with. Like a fragrance, each lubricant will act different with each person based on preference and skin type.

Your local grocer will stock a few lubricants. They are typically found with the condoms. However to get silicone and thicker water based products, a sex toy shop is the only solution. If you value your sexual privacy, there are also many lubricants available to be ordered online.

A Few Cautions

Sexual lubricants are very safe to use. However if you have skin sensitivities, allergies, vaginal infections, or are attempting to conceive, you will need to do further research on the products you use. Food and household lubricants such as butter, cooking oil, or mechanical lubricants should never be used.

Still wary? Try a free sample of astroglide.