Making Oatmeal Like a Man
Oatmeal. Filled with complex carbohydrates, fiber, beta-glucen, and a bunch of other stuff that is supposedly good for us. There is nothing quite as satisfying as opening a dainty little packet of Quaker Oats Weight Control Banana Bread Oatmeal on a Tuesday morning and musing about the how good you’ll look at the beach. Unless you’re a man that is.
Rolled Oats. Now that is some bad ass shit. Big chunky oats that come in bulk. Thick rich oats that you actually need to pull out a pot and boil water for. This is a man’s oatmeal. A man’s oatmeal that takes about the same time to prepare.
Preparation is easy.
- 1 part quick rolled oats
- 2 parts water
Put them both in a pot, bring it to a boil, and then simmer till deliciousness follows. Total prep time is under 10 minutes. I peeled three hard boiled eggs while I waited and still hadn’t thrown half the yolks out when the oats were done. Pour a little milk over the top, and it’s ready to serve.
8 Responses to “Making Oatmeal Like a Man”
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I like to add three spoonfuls of applesauce and a splash of vanilla soy milk to my bowl of oatmeal. Brown sugar and a dab of maple syrup is also good.
I’m a big fan of steel cut oatmeal over rolled, as I prefer the texture (kind of reminds me of grits.. little pellets, soft outside with a firmer interior). Takes a while (~30 mins) to cook up, but you can easily cook a large portion and reheat in the microwave as steel cut oats don’t turn into glue like rolled does
I like experimenting with my ‘meal. Mixing in things like strawberry jam, various fruits, raisins, nuts, etc!
A little cinnamon or peanut butter for protein is tasty too. Oh and crasins.
I gotta agree with the steel cuts, that is hard core oatmeal. You can go sweet or savory with them as well. I dig dried cherries and/or dried figs with mine…
I think regular Quaker Oats (in the carboard cylinder) are plenty manly, especially if eaten plain. They also take less than two minutes to cook in the microwave.
The packets you mention are the absolute worst. Chock full of sugar, girly ingredients, and high fructose corn syrup to boot!
Yes. Steel cut are the ultimate best. Try using (unfiltered, unsweetened) apple juice instead of water, and tossing in some dried apple slices/chunks, plus a little cinnamon. The steel cut ones do take longer to cook, but you can make a largish batch, then reheat in the microwave for breakfast for several days. Whoops, I just read Jess’ comment, well great minds think alike) Add a little extra juice or water if they’re too thick after sitting in the refrigerator. You can experiment with different juices, fruits and seasonings for a change each time. Try half apricot nectar (unsweetened) and half water, plus dried apricots and nutmeg, or better yet a little grated fresh ginger. Go wild!! Add some toasted slivered almonds on top. Buy all the ingredients at stores like Wild Oats or Whole Food Market, organic for sure. BTW, Cash. Exactly WHAT are ‘girly’ ingredients? Things that taste good? Learning to cook great things is a sure-fire way to a woman’s heart. Turn around is fair play.
Hahah, oh Caroline. Methinks you missed the joke. Greg implied in his post that any fruity additions to oatmeal take the testosterone level down a few notches.
It should be said in all seriousness though; most people assume that ‘any’ oatmeal is good for you, neglecting to look at the ingredients/nutritional info on those horrible packets. The sugar content is typically through the roof, not to mention the potential for HFCS.
Cash,
Don’t be a hater on the girlie ingredients!
P.S. Instant oatmeal != manly oatmeal.