How Life Should Be

Hippy Sarah: no, i havent’ fogotten my english…that would be bad, since i’m teaching it

Hippy Sarah: i am being much too influenced by british english however

Greg: do you drink delicious wine everyday?

Greg: and eat lots of non-vegan cheese and gluten rich bread?

Hippy Sarah: you know it

Hippy Sarah: wine is so cheap

Hippy Sarah: and produce is so cheap!

Hippy Sarah: and of course, baguettes are fabulous

Hippy Sarah: i can buy a bottle of wine, excellent cheese, and a baguette for less than 3 euro

Greg: what!?

Greg: that is living

Hippy Sarah: the food alone is reason enough for me to stay

Hippy Sarah: i’m telling you, you have to come some day

Holiday Gadgetry

I’ve been compiling an Urban Monarch holiday gift guide for the 2008 season.  I’ve got most of the slots filled, but I’m looking for a few more items.  Any gadgets you’re longing for this holiday season?  Anything shiny that has your eye?  What are you wishing to unwrap this year?

No Laptop, Will Travel

Today is a monumentous occassion.  I’m leaving for Dallas for the weekend and I’m not bringing my laptop.  For the past four months I’ve been working 60-80 consistently.  For the year before that, I worked remotely.  So, no matter when I travelled the laptop was in tow.  This weekend, it is the first time in years this has occurred.  Amazing.

Dear People at the Grocery Store

I need a bus pass to get to work.  I had plenty of time to get one and get to work should 10 of you not decided that you needed to return your carpet clearner, get quarters for laundry, cash in your lottery winnings, and tender your coinstar receipt. People cashing welfare checks, I have nothing to say to you.

Morning Travel Routine

Activity	Time Spent (mm:ss)
Walking	1:28
Waiting	0:32
Bus	15:09
Waiting	11:21
Train	12:37
Walking	9:22

You’re probably wondering, why did greg just publish the amount of time he spends walking, waiting, and riding public transportation on one morning. Me too. But this is it. Take it for what it’s worth.

Thoughts on Life: Pretending

Who am I pretending to be and to what end?

Last Twitter that Forced me to Read Aloud

Just try and stop yourself.

Just as I enjoyed removing the “o” from “Olympics”, I’ll enjoy removing the “a” from “Apocalypse”. When that time comes.

Awayken

Urban Monarch Site News

I’ve gotten a lot of instant messages over the past few days about what the future of Urban Monarch will hold.  To keep everyone in the loop, I’m going to create a little more transparency to the site administration.  After all, Urban Monarch is something we all share.

Three changes happening at Urban Monarch as we speak.

1.  Content and category improvement.  There are two areas I’m currently focusing on, podcast reviews and the book club.  The podcast review is a new category that needs a bit of promotion and a bit more on production.  The book club is an existing feature that I want to move to a more regular schedule (regularly one book a month).  You’ll notice a new widget appearing in the sidebar highlighting the book club.  Make sure you get the book, as the first reading discussion is on Oct 15th.

2.  The schedule will be changing to two posts a day.  The posts will be coming to you at 9am and 12p mountain time every weekday.

3.  Finally, and most interestingly, I’ll be introducing some new authors.  The first of which has an exciting new feature starting Thursday.  Eric Starling will be writing a regular column called Curb2Cave, a guide for urbanites looking to explore the outdoors.  If you’re interested in writing for Urban Monarch, email me at greg@urbanmonarch.com and we can discuss options.

Urban Monarch: You Vote

Are you registered to vote?  Do you know how to register?  If you don’t, check out this sweet Google App. 

If you’re in Colorado, you have till Monday Oct 6th.  If you want to check your status, the Colorado Secretary of State Elections center will help you verify your voter information.

Farewell to UM; An Ode, A Lament

“Hang on tightly, let go lightly”.

It was Clive Owen’s refrain in “The Croupier” and it’s damn good advice.  Having spent the last two and half years consumed by my passion for Urban Monarch, our readers and my partnership with Greg however, it’s not the easiest to follow.

I’d be lying if I said I didn’t feel a touch of sadness when faced with the prospect of Urban Monarch free days. It’s become a part of me.  So many great memories.  From the simple thrill of brainstorming over coffee @ Leela’s to the extravagant debauchery of our epic Las Vegas boondoggle, UM has proven a deliciously naughty mistress indeed.  I feel blessed to have welcomed so many new friends into my life through UM as well (Goat, Steve, Jess, Caroline, Telan.. I’m looking at you for starters).  The education I’ve received from Greg on all things blogosphere, Google analytics and the like has been priceless, and the pride I’ve felt knowing thousands of people all over the world are reading and responding to my writing has been fulfilling in ways even a million dollar payday never could be.

Read more

Cash Tribute

When the question came of how to handle Urban Monarch in its growing months, I was faced with a difficult decision: disturb a spirit hell bent on experiencing life or push too hard on a long lasting friendship.  It’s with this fork Cash continues his journey on his own terms and with our friendship fully in tact.  In only his adolescence of writing he has shown the promise of becoming a great author with the full desire neccessary to achieve it.  The world needs more Hunter S. Thompsons, and Cash, my friend, you are well on your way.

One Thing I Hate: Lowrider Toilets

If my knees are above my waist when using the facilities, I am not a happy man.

One Thing I Wish I Had: A Bicycle

 

I’ve been talking about wanting a bike for over a year.  It’s about time I get one.  I’m reminded of this when I miss my bus and wish I had another option for getting to the train station.

iPhone Headphones Backup

It’s a sad day to realize your iPhone is in your pocket but your headphones are in your apartment. Perhaps I need multiple backup headphones like I have multiple backup power cords… At least I have portable wordpress.

Cash’s Goodbye + Bloody Mary Secret Code

It’s been a helluva ride aboard the Urban Monarch express. Like all good great things though, I knew it would someday come to an end. That ’someday’ turns out to be the end of this week. Don’t expect me to get all sappy on you just yet; (wait till Friday, 4PM for that, suckas) you’ve still got 5 days worth of Cash-tastic posts to enjoy here on UM.

After that? Don’t worry.. I won’t be far. In fact, my new home on the world wide web will feature all the hedonistic, irresponsibly tasty content you’ve been enjoying here, along with some new surprises. Greg and I remain great friends, but realize that after two fun-filled years ruling the Urban Monarch kingdom together, it’s time to divide and conquer.

Read more

Overheard In Denver

I said some really mean things to him.. at one point, I told him I hope he has a seizure

-Sobbing woman on the 16th Street Mall shuttle aka ‘the greasy pole’

Get Rid Of Things

Get rid of things is a site focused on eliminating every minor annoyance in your life.

From the food stains on your couch, to the spyware on your computer, to the food stains all over your spyware, your life is a mess. Here to help with all of it: How To Get Rid Of Things.

Special treat just for the likes of Greg and other green-centric readers?

GR also presents a sidebar that highlights organic products/natural solutions to whatever ails you; once you start using potassium alum mineral as deodorant, your life’s only blemish will be if someone sees you rubbing your pits with a rock.

via Thrillist

how to forget

We’ve done a few posts on improving one’s mental abilities, i.e memory, focus, etc.  But what happens when you want to do just the opposite?  I need to forget a particular phone number. Pronto.  Any tips/tricks you might suggest?

P.S. Yes, I’ve tried booze.  No, it doesn’t work.

setting up the impressive spare

Back when I used to bowl each and every Sunday night, I came up with a little phrase I’ve been thinking about a lot lately.  If I didn’t knock down a single pin on the first go round of a frame, I’d call out to my friends

“Don’t worry, just setting up the impressive spare.”

Sometimes I was doing just that.  Sometimes, not.  Either way, I had my mind in the right place.

Tour de Fat

Tour de Fat his Denver tomorrow, Saturday September 13th, 2008.  Basically it’s really sweet bicycle party/parade.  If you’re in town, or it’s stopping near you, make sure to hit it up.

Tour de Fat

quote of the day: work it real good

Being forced to work, and forced to do your best, will breed in you temperance and self-control, diligence and strength of will, cheerfulness and content, and a hundred virtues which the idle will never know. 
-Charles Kingsley

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